The week after the November 2020 election, I produced a special edition of my weekly video “vlog.” I had been reflecting on the election and how it created more division and polarization in our country about what is right vs. wrong—and I’m not just talking about political parties here.
In the weeks and months since the election, we have only seen this divide magnified, as many groups continue to criticize, demean and hold contempt for others. This, despite the fact that our shared heritage as Americans, what we have in common, and our natural human need to be whole and unified is needed now more than ever.
There has always been “them vs. us” in our society. Wherever you grew up, there were the cool kids vs. the nerdy kids; the ones that went to one school vs. the kids that went to the other school. We find validation, support and community with groups of like-minded people, and that is generally helpful and beneficial. But what we are experiencing today is very different.
We are definitely in a time when we are more likely to classify people into the “in” or “out” groups. We have more of an emotional and physiological reaction to people if they are “in “or “out” based on our perspective. This extreme divide impacts our ability to show empathy, to see what we have in common and not just our differences. It really pains me to see how people are attacking – verbally and physically – people from “the other side” on the news.
And unfortunately, it’s still not clear if we will see real progress on this front, despite the fact that many of us had hoped 2021 would be different. It is important to acknowledge and accept that we have a limited amount of control in this situation. But as leaders, we are in a unique position to have an impact with our teams, to create a more accepting, tolerant and respectful work environment.
If you are familiar with my work, you know I draw on science-based practices to help leaders navigate challenging times. So I wanted to offer some tips to help you build a bridge over these divides and restore trust and tolerance in your organization.
First, a couple of points to consider. Since the pandemic began, we have all been in a heightened state of anxiety and personal threat. Our people are dealing with cognitive overload; they are taxed emotionally and have no personal resources left to deal with another emotional factor like the election. Just consider all the issues people have been dealing with: trying to stay safe and healthy; working remotely; educating children at home; caring for family members; managing family dynamics; establishing new routines for shopping, exercising, and living in close quarters. These are just some of the many challenges that have become part of our daily lives.
And it feels like just when we feel like we are settling in, getting somewhat used to this new set of circumstances, a new challenge puts us back on the defense.
We’ve talked before about how our brains are wired to be anchored to the negative, to possible threats and dangers that we see. With all these issues and negativity, we simply have no room left to handle another issue.
And keeping our teams engaged and productive? Well, that’s even a bigger challenge than normal in this environment.
So, what is the potential impact on your team? The Gartner Group recently conducted a survey and found that 36% of people are avoiding their co-workers because of politics and the follow-up from the election. In times when bringing people together in cross-functional roles to solve complex problems is more important than ever, this can be a major concern.
Think about that. Have you experienced this yourself? Have you seen signs of this in your team? I know many of us have.
One of my clients (a very outgoing, high-energy and approachable leader) recently shared how he is just plain exhausted after all of this—and can’t wait for the weekend to withdraw. I think many of you can identify with this response.
But what does this all mean to you? What can you do as a leader? Where do you start?
Your role as a leader is to be the binding energy that helps people navigate through the next few months. You need to provide emotional stability for your team to get them through continuing uncertainty and challenge.
Here are three science-based actions you can take right now to support your team and build a bridge over even the deepest divisions:
1. Label the emotion
You can’t make people’s anxiety, fear, or anger go away, but just by asking them to share how they are feeling, you are activating the brain’s braking system and allowing them to use the limited cognitive resources they have on other things. I call this “Name it to tame it.” Then you can consider how to deal with what they are facing – but this is the first, critical step.
2. Restate – clearly – the values of your organization
This very important action gives people purpose and meaning they need in this time. Don’t assume that people already know. Their world has changed, and they need to know from you that your direction has not.
3. Focus on the shared goals of your team
Be specific. Help your team members see how they can build on their prior success and achieve more together. Our neural pathways are developed over time through shared experiences as we build relationships with others. This can be challenging while we shelter-in-place, but there are ways to build empathy and teamwork in a virtual environment.
Taking these actions can create feelings of security in an environment of unrelenting uncertainty. They activate the part of the brain responsible for inspiration, creativity and problem-solving and can be a powerful unifying mechanism.